Day 63 my first thing to see when I opened my eyes this morning... sweet girl loves having Mama sleep in the chair next to her bed. itty bitty little girl feet... love love the sweet girl toes... my tiniest girl... she loves her sleep and is a cuddler in
Day 62 Tomorrow, day 63, I have my last scheduled chemotherapy. I have no idea why, when I started this blog, I counted out 64 days. I was sure, and I counted several times, that it was going to be 64 days of chemo, from start to finish... but I
Day 60 Come sit awhile I see the fear behind your eyes The baggage you are carrying Come step inside and sit awhile And set aside your pain. For here is laughter, tears and love, A time to live and breathe. Lay down your burden, Come sit a while And
Day 53 A letter to my husband- ... and a preface... Marriages are inherently private. Our marriage has seen the best of times and the worst of times. There were days when the both of us were not sure we would see another week or month or year together. Somehow, through
Day 52 Some days, I just want to forget.. escape. I don't want to write about my struggle, or talk to people about why I don't have hair. Sometimes, I just want to pretend that life is normal and that I am ok. It's denial, I guess. Just part of
Day 46 The blues... sometimes, when you HAVE the blues, things are sad. That is how I feel these first few days after chemo... sad, lonely, empty, blue, raw, washed out... but this picture, from our trip to the beach this past August, this picture CELEBRATES the blue of the
Day 42 I have resisted and RESISTED posting a pic of my head without hair. I refuse to shave... I only have wisps now, but they are MY wisps and they keep me warmer with the hats.... (that is my excuse, I think) This is so hard for me to
Day 41 It's the day before chemo. I have been taking my meds, doing my bowel regimen. I have my bag packed and a gift for my sweet fellow chemo friend, Karen. I have books to read, a craft to do, gum to chew, my music to listen to. I
Day 25 I went walking with a friend today. I was anxious and stressed and starting to feel sickly today. We had planned to have the girls go to Grandma's today, but I was feeling sad, shipping them off. I was feeling sad, that I was in this terrible situation,
Day 23 Post-second-chemo day 1. I slept hard last night. I awoke and couldn't remember what day it was... Friday. Still had to get the girls up and ready for school. The twins were moving slowly, so Daddy took Merus to school and I got the twins ready and somehow,